Protocols A group of Jews endeavors towards total domination of the blogosphere. |
Saturday, September 06, 2003 Jerry Falwell on the spiritual state of the union: Has America crossed the line of no return?I wonder what he thinks will happen if America doesn't suddendly convert to Southern Baptism. I mean, if we get overrun by the radical Islamists, that would only be a victory for the Godless, which shouldn't happen according to him. However bad we are, they must be much worse, right? Maybe he thinks we'll get overrun by Roman Catholics. Yeah, that must be it. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 11:03 PM | Naomi Chana watches television. Hilarity ensues: I had flipped past it before the sentence registered, and at first, I thought I was having mezuzah-related auditory hallucinations, which is about the most boring religious mania I can think of offhand. But I flipped back, and sure enough, there was the Scary Protestant Channel in all its glory, with the usual Distinguished White Guy sitting there demonstrating... yes, a mezuzah. Or, as he put it, a "me-zu-ZAH." In the minute or so before the commercial break, I managed to deduce that (a) either the Scary Protestant Channel or just the Distinguished White Guy's "ministry" was having some kind of fundraiser or pledge drive**, and (b) the me-zu-ZAH (with mass-produced scroll) was a Free Gift With Donation. The whole exercise was laden with references to returning the Jews to the "kingdom of Israel" and, of course, sponsoring the monarchical candidacy of one J.C. (Funny, I thought he'd turned down that job. Of course, if they're able to get people into the kingdom of Israel, I want to buy their time machine, not a fake mezuzah. I've always wanted to know more about the eighth century B.C.E.)Great stuff, all of it. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 10:57 PM | "EU recognizes Hamas as terror organization" (Thanks, Yuter). The decision, which both Israel and the US intensively lobbied for, was made at a meeting of the 15 European foreign ministers in Riva Del Garda, Italy. The EU previously had blacklisted only the group's military arm, Izzadin Kassam. But it agreed Saturday to block funding to Hamas political offshoots, fund-raising charities and social welfare groups.posted by Steven I. Weiss | 9:55 PM | Making of a Godol eBay auction, now with 3 days and 11 hours left, still has 0 bids. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 9:32 PM |Friday, September 05, 2003 Apparently, Eichman's son is a respected archeologist, who is currently doubting the historicity of the Queen of Sheba (washingtonpost.com). Who knew? posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 4:37 PM |Parsha Senryu -- Parshas Ki Seitzei
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Harry seems to be back to blogging regularly. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 9:39 AM |Thursday, September 04, 2003 EphShap finds a copy of Making of a Godol for sale on EBay. The starting bid is $350.00, and as of the time of this post, there are no takers. With 5 days, 10 hours left, we'll see what comes of this. It's probably not good for the owner that his Feedback rating is a goose egg.
According to silly girl lore, reciting Shir ha'Shirim once a day for forty days is a magical panacea for finding your bashert be'korev. With that in mind, I am going to bli neder recite Shir ha'Shirim daily for the prescribed forty days, commencing later today (Ches Elul), and track my progress towards kallah-land in this blog.UPDATE: There seems to be some confusion about this post -- I didn't write the above, merely quoted the lady blogger linked before it. In general, blockquote format means that we're quoting somebody. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 10:45 PM | Dei'ah veDibur op-ed about introspection as the High Holy Days roll in: We are now in the middle of Elul, the season of teshuvoh. We must certainly check our own ways and repent. But with an eye to the breakdown in so many areas of traditional morality that pervades the societies around us, it is of vital importance that we inspect ourselves and insulate ourselves and our families to ensure that -- Rachmono litzlan -- this general moral deterioration does not have effects, chas vesholom, on our lives as lived according to the Torah.Pretty standard fare. However, check out this paragraph from further up in the article, when the author lists examples of the moral breakdown: US government is sinking deep into debt while embracing major spending programs and cutting taxes at the same time. Meanwhile it is working, but at some point things will break down. State governments are relying on gimmicks and tricks to avoid facing the reality. In California, when the governor presented a rational program of expense cuts and tax raises, he was threatened with being turned out of office. This shows an utter flight from responsibility.Balanced budgets are part of a government's moral responsibility to its citizens, in other words. Now that's interesting. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 12:36 PM | Wednesday, September 03, 2003 I'm pretty sure I don't get it. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 10:40 PM |In a story about a councilman protesting an all-Korean storefront sign in Queens, there are some odd defenses of the store. The councilman is invoking an old law that seems to require some English on signs, and civil liberties types are up in arms. As an appetizer, we have this: "Such a requirement, from a civil liberties perspective, is not kosher," said Donna Lieberman, executive director of the New York Civil Liberties Union. "The government cannot compel or prohibit speech based on its content - or form."It's strange that the term "kosher" has made its way not only into popular culture, but also into the formal discourse typical of someone in Lieberman's position. But the actually funny comment is: Jeffrey Fogel, legal director for the Center for Constitutional Rights, said he can't understand why anyone is upset by the sign.I'm glad that my Yiddish-speaking precedents are getting credit for having builty this country, especially since they really didn't. To quote Jeffrey Lebowski, "We're not talking about a guy that built the fucking railroads, here." posted by Steven I. Weiss | 8:02 PM | There's something symbolic about moving on your birthday. Anyway, I'm just taking a short break to grab a glance at the Jewish Press Letters Section. Some good entries this week. Sam Rieger exposes the Bloomberg Israel visit (all 8 hours of it) for the PR stunt it was. The Token Frum Christian (tm) writes in support of the 10 Commandments and to reiterate his support for Israel, despite the Jewishness of the ACLU. (Dr.) Yaakov Stern weighs in on Shmuley Boteach and Dr. Laura, and, ki-darko ha-qodesh, comes out against contemporary Orthodoxy. All great reading.
In reading the recent letters to the editor regarding the lack of friendliness displayed by those who do not greet everyone they see on the street with a hearty “Good Shabbos,” I came to the following conclusion.Seemingly, you'd only notice that other people weren't greeting you if you weren't greeting others, since nobody in the history of the world has ever greeted someone, only to be [deliberately] ignored. This letter is ingenius for its ability to both come out in favor of saying "Good Shabbas" to people also leveling a devestating personal attack against the "pro-Good Shabbas" camp, all at the same time. Incidentally, the phrase 'Kol ha`posel, pasul' (lit. "He, who invalidates, is invalid") does not necessarily mean that the invalidator is invalid for the same invalidation that he's invalidating others for in the first place. In other words, it could well be that the "pro-Good Shabbas" camp memebers are all very outgoing, effusive people who greet everyone they meet (even if their cholent ends up cold). However, the fact that they wage bitter letter-writing campaigns might be symptomatic of other flaws in their personalities - a prediliction towards bitter letter-writing campaigns, perhaps. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 5:39 PM | Not what I needed to see today: Thousands of haredim turned out Monday night in a continuing protest against Egged's launch of a mehadrin (strictly kosher) bus line, in which men sit at the front and women at the back, running between haredi neighborhoods in Beit Shemesh and Jerusalem.What this really illustrates is exactly how little the two sides here understand each other. The Haredim are convinced Egged is trying to maliciously undercut them (and their interpretation of halakha) while Egged is mystified how such a friendly gesture on their part could be met with such hostility. Wow. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 12:53 PM | Interesting piece on Sightings as the School Year kicks into gear: Not many years ago, many of us pointed to nearly zero coverage of the little bit of religion news that was occurring. Now the question has to do with readership. Who will interpret these sacred happenings, and how will anyone put to work any knowledge gained of them? Now there are more happenings and printed reports and events than ever before, but is a college-bred population ready to do some discerning?I would say that the blogosphere - especially the rather large part of it made up of college professors and students (and student-types) - is a step in the right direction here. Whenever anything happens religion-wise, its not too hard anymore to find or express an opinion, and from all sorts of cool perspectives. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 12:45 PM | A reader writes in regarding Rabbi Forsyth: FYI - regarding Rabbi Forsyth - this is a guy in his 40's who is never been married and is an "expert" or marital and other relationships??????BTW: Our generation refers to the "older singles scene" by the more appropriate name, "the graveyard shift." I have nothing else to say about the latter, but if the former is true, that's really quite funny. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 8:13 AM | Whew. And I thought they said "March 21, 2004..."
In the WOO HOO!!!! Department:
Tuesday, September 02, 2003 Ask the Elders, Vol. I
Dear Elders, The Elders Respond SIW: Dear Gem, Having seen too many of my RIETS friends marry the attraction equivalent of a paper bag because they felt she was the second coming of Bruria, I'm not sure there is much hope for you. Whereas guys used to hide certain magazines in their dorm rooms, they've now been replaced with JOFA brochures and Drisha course catalogs. However, try this Pavlovian methodology: Much like training a pet to relieve itself in the proper area by conditioning, perhaps you can "train" your love to see the softer side of you. Wear a necklace that quotes a Talmudic passage of choice, preferably a sexist one, and teach him to appreciate your unexposed collarbone. Continue on to have the same printed on a shirt so that he can stare at your breasts (or, as they're known to rabbinical students, "hoo hoos" and "tah tahs"). Then, at the next Lag Ba'Omer celebration, set up a face-painting stand and have a fellow learned Stern student draw the first chapter of Tractate Berachos on your forehead. This way, when he looks at you, he'll see a Talmudic discussion of a starry night and sunrise -- truly romantic. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 8:12 PM | It was only a matter of time...: Following in the footsteps of Madonna, Roseanne Barr and his ex-girlfriend Briittany Murphy, Just Married star Kutcher has started to show great interest in the mystical offshoot of Judaism.I'll say it again -- the Kabbalah Center: Scientology Done Jewish. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 7:19 PM | James Davila promises to keep blogging away, even as he finishes his book. I'd just like to say that I'm going to try to keep blogging, even as I spend the year in the kollel. I would also like to point out that Davila has less of an excuse for a drop-off than I do, seeing as though he probably has constant access to the internet from whatever library/office he's operating out of, while the YU beit midrash does not yet have any sort of ethernet hookup. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 7:09 PM |Reader Meredith has apparently been poring over "Questions to Rabbi Forsyth" and came up with this gem of an exchange: Question: I have been with a girl for a year now. It's a long-distance relationship, but i manage to see her often enough as to make her happy. We are not shomer negiah. We feel we are not strong enough, but we love each other deeply. I am a 19 year old male, and she is a 17 year old female. We've discussed marriage, and we both agree that we want to spend the rest of our lives together. The thing is, she is too young, i am studying medicine at university, and she has only begun her undergraduate's degree. When is a good time to propose, since we don't have jobs, and make no earnings? and also, will we be able to have a successful marriage, even though we aren't shomer negiah (we are not having sex, but we do almost everything else). I know this is a very disgraceful thing, and is strictly prohibited by the Torah, will our marriage be ruined because of this?In general, I'd respect the kid asking the question, but since he sent it in as a question, I don't think I do. Rabbi Forsythe, based on a perusal of this and other letters, seems to be something of a schmuck. I'm sure that all those couples who married following those Young Israel dances in the middle of the last century turned out far worse than, say, Bobovers. BTW, how funny is it that the kid wrote out that he and his girlfriend "do almost everything else" other than sex? Hi-larious. Anyway, I think it's about time that Protocols joined the ranks of all these other Jews giving advice on the Web. I hereby inaugurate our new feature, "Ask the Elders." At least once a week, we'll pick the best question received and at least one of us will answer it -- and if you can't come up with a question, we'll make one up for you and slap your name on it. All questions can be submitted anonymously or, preferably, with suitably-funny pseudonyms. Send in your questions by e-mail to me or in comments to this post. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 6:02 PM | Tamara thinks we have a problem with deifying Nicole Kidman: When I was in the supermarket recently I was stopped dead in my tracks by the September cover of Vogue magazine. There was a luminous Nicole Kidman, resplendent in a formal gown, rising from a frothy, billowy fabric sea like a cinematic Aphrodite. The caption appropriately read "On Life as an Icon."Anyone who can't tell the difference between worshipping Nicole Kidman and worshipping a golden calf is engaging in unacceptable moral relativism. Meantime, scroll down there for Tamara's thoughts on being a "Frum Wannabe." posted by Steven I. Weiss | 11:32 AM | Gimlet Eyes is back to blogging and is now an uncle to 15. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 11:27 AM |OnlySimchas: "Birth of 8th baby girl to Meilech Schwartz no boys, yet :( "
Monday, September 01, 2003 The Baltimore Sun asks "Is the Bible history or fiction?" and answers with a definite "yes". posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 2:56 PM |Um...yeah
I think the pursuit of Osama bin Laden, and our stated aim to take him dead or alive, should be rethought. He is, after all, the leader of the political wing of Al Qaeda's and killing him would undoubtedly just inflame "the region."While I'm sure readers can show me something I've missed, I don't think I've come across the argument made so precisely as that. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 1:15 PM | Reader Duvie writes in response to Sam: I found Sam's hymn to Avraham Burg an ugly little screed.posted by Steven I. Weiss | 8:59 AM | NYT endorses Ydanis Rodriguez in Washington Heights City Council Race: 10th District (Washington Heights, Inwood): Miguel Martinez, the first-term incumbent, is a likable, low-key politician. But a district with desperate problems like a lack of affordable housing and severely overcrowded classrooms would benefit from an infusion of independent ideas and energy. Ydanis Rodriguez, a teacher and grass-roots organizer who has worked with immigrant children and created a local college preparatory program, has demonstrated a special kind of vitality in pressing for better services for the community. Recently, when the subway stop at 191st Street was closed for repairs through the end of the year, Mr. Rodriguez led a successful effort to get shuttle service for residents. We endorse Ydanis Rodriguez.The Elders as the Governing Board of the Commentator in 2001 endorsed Ydanis for Council: intro, district issues, endorsement. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 8:43 AM | Sunday, August 31, 2003 This site, rishonim.com, is being adverstised by a flier outside the YU Beit Midrash. More comments after I check out their sample, but more Torah on the web can't be a bad thing, right? posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 11:18 PM |Agent Emes will protect your shofars from fish-head-wielding anti-Semites. Or something like that. Thanks to Reader Meredith for this peek at life for those wacky, wacky Yids.
Award-winning filmmaker, Leibel Cohen, is set to release the first of an exciting, mystery-adventure video series. At long last, a video Jewish parents can get for their middle-schoolers that won't have them asking "but is it appropriate?"Lord knows, my parents had many such worries about my watching Square One. It strikes me as exceedingly chauvinist that this video is simply asserted as appropriate because it's made by certain Jews. How about needlessly feeding fears of anti-Semitism -- shouldn't that be inappropriate? UPDATE: Some claiming to be the creator, Leib Cohen, writes in the comments, Stevie-To which I respond that I'd like to know what his beef is. The trailer shows a scene at Dr. Lo-Tov's lair in which the distasteful enemy hatches his plot against the Jews -- announcing, "The Jews are once again foiling my diabolical plan -- this time, I've got a new plan." Lo-Tov then assumedly proceeds to destroy or damage or befoul or do what-have-you to shofars at the local factory. This kind of storytelling is distasteful to begin with -- stories of a mythically great and empowered Jewish people taking on an always-engaged anti-Semitic enemy seriously damage the worldly perceptions of the kids who consume this stuff. There is a real problem of continually building these anti-Semitic figures in Jewish storytelling, and there are truly negative results. As an example, let's imagine this video being played for a fifth-grade classroom, as a sort of semi-educational break from the monotony of the rest of class. Naturally, it would be followed by some sort of question-and-answer or perhaps a quiz worth ten points or somesuch: Morah Beila: Okay, class, tell me who the hero of the story is?I enumerated much of that already, but I think it's important to understand that message coming from a kid's mouth. Those are the plot points, and that's how kids will read them. So, for one thing, this is a bad message to give to kids, an indoctrination to fear and loathing. Yes, the video is meant to be cute, and it is cute that the kid's a super-hero, etc. -- but the message is still quite harmful. Kids' cartoons are often about a fight between good and evil, but that makes this point only more relevant: if Mummra is Dr. Lo-Tov representing the non-Jew of the film and Lion-O is Agent Emes protecting the Thundercats as Jews, well, we're seeing a rather black-and-white picture that distorts reality for these kids. I'm not opposed to seeing good cat-like humans take on an evil and semi-disembodied mummy, nor to machines led by an Optimus Prime take on machines with some other leader, nor to the forces of good teeth and Crest Gel taking on the Armies of Plaque; you can have these dichotomies, just don't make them about Jews vs. the Non-Jew. Imagine, for instance, that this story was about Agent Emes vs. the the Hasidim Who Want to Abolish Zmanei Tefila. You'd have a huge uproar about it, and rightly so. So what's the difference here? And, again, I'm almost more perturbed by the hugely chauvinistic stance implied by the blurb for this video stating that it is, "At long last, a video Jewish parents can get for their middle-schoolers that won't have them asking 'but is it appropriate?'" ANOTHER UPDATE: And he's back! Leib Cohen comments again: To which I respond:We were pretty clear on that point before we watched your video; I'm sure the kids intended to watch your video are, as well -- they don't need this to teach the lesson to them. 2. How do you know Dr. Lo-Tov is a gentile?His nose is too sleek. Maybe I'm just generalizing, but I typically assume that evil characters that speak angrily of "the Jews" in fictions created by Jews are meant to be gentile. That's not always the case, but I didn't get the sense that this video had an overly-complex moral message. And if Dr. Lo-Tov is a Jew, well, I'm sure I won't be the only one criticizing this -- Jewish Press readers whip out "sinas chinam" quicker than a student of the Rav can say "Categorical Imperative." 3. Please tell me where I can find some of these videos (or stories) of “mythically great and powerful Jewish people”. I'd like to show them to my kids. Anything to offset the negative stereotypes they are used to seeing in the media.Well, if that's what you're gonna do with, I certainly won't tell you! Note how he chops off the end of my statement above, only further indicating how much he cares about images of strong Jewish people and how little he cares about their "taking on an always-engaged anti-Semitic enemy." But, to respond in good faith, you'll find messages along these lines in oodles of children's books ranging from stories about the Golem to ones with more realism to them, to severely-strained retellings of the Maccabee stories. Of course, they're also in some "adult" books that are categorized in seeming random fashion as fiction, biography and history, produced by our leading (English-language) Jewish publishers. I'm not so up on the video market and have only vague recollections of grade school videos, so can't say much about that medium -- but keep your kids away from the telly and glued to Artscroll, and surely they'll grow up to make videos just like yours. All that said, I do commend you on your remarkable insight, which goes to far as to break down the entire AE story based on a 2-minute trailer, to the extent that you are able to divine classroom discussions that haven't occurred yet.That's why I'm special. But seriously, if you were able to refute the points I've put forward, then we'd have something worthy of discussion, but you didn't -- instead focusing on tangential issues that have nothing to do with the character of my criticism. And if you'd like to see what a review of the entire video would look like, please send a review copy to Jewsweek Magazine at my attention. You might find some consolation in knowing that the original script of the story DID call for a cat to play Agent-Emes and a tube of toothpaste to play Dr. Lo-Tov. Unfortunately, all the talking cats in Pittsburgh were in other shows, and I didn’t have the budget to animate the toothpaste tube. If “Agent Emes” sells – which I expect it to – I may be able to rectify this in future episodes.I don't know; it seems that Lion-O's been out of work for some time and wouldn't be too hard to come by -- same for Panthro. Cheetara, sources in-the-know claim, is working on a comeback. By the way, I am sorry to have perturbed you. Should I cancel the series?Thanks for the apology. I don't know that I object to the series as a whole, so far just this episode and your PR material; get that fixed, and we'll talk. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 7:35 PM | I just got my TV hooked-up to the cable for reception, and am surprised to find that I'm getting the Food Network, which I'll be watching pretty close to all day long. Right now, Food 911 is playing, and the host is helping to teach an Israeli-American young woman named Karen to make falafel like she made at home. Host: So do you cook a lot? She goes on to tell a story about something she made a couple years ago. Later on, they're making taboule, and he plops some of it into a bowl, asking Karen "Do you have a spoon?" She holds up her cutlery, ready to dig in. "No," the host intervenes, "a stirring spoon." She finds one and commences stirring. A simple direction to pour chickpeas into the Cuisinart leads to spectacular spillage. All the while, she's teaching him a bit, since he knows how to cook it, but not how to eat it. So, for instance, she intructs him that he's making his falafel balls too big. Food 911, the JAP episode. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 1:41 PM | Southern Baptists take on Egalitarianism: America's largest Protestant denomination, the Southern Baptist Convention (SBC), for example, now insists the Bible prescribes male pastoral leadership in church and the 'gracious submission' of wives to their husbands. As a result:And so on. As might be expected, this is finding some resistance among many evangelicals who point to verses like Gal. 3:28: There is neither Jew or Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesusor who've noticed that some Christians working in Eastern Europe have found that promoting female subordination undermines their evangelism. After years of communist egalitarianism, people aren't very receptive.This is where dogma and social policy intersect, I guess. The Jewish equivalent possibly is on the left-wing side of Modern Orthodoxy, and comes through in YCT's Rabbi Dov Linzer's review of Rabbi Yehuda Henkin's Equality Lost (a book everyone should buy and own, incidentally). Linzer notes that The book’s first essay, also entitled “Equality Lost,” seems to promise by virtue of its title that it will articulate a vision of an ideal halakhic and religious system where women and men are deemed equals. This promise, however, is only partly fulfilled. R. Henkin’s vision of ideal Judaism affords women equal respect and dignity but at the same time affirms role differentiation and hierarchy of status. What we have lost is not gender equality of roles and status, but rather due regard for women’s equal intelligence, potential, and dignityHe goes on to suggest that One searching for a fundamental value of equality would be naturally drawn to the first chapter of Genesis, where man and woman are created simultaneously and equally be-tselem Elohim, in the image of God, and are equally blessed and commanded by their Creator. The divisions of role and status that are found in the Torah occur only later: between man and woman, in Genesis 2, where Eve is created from Adam and for the purpose of helping and completing him; and between Jew and non-Jew, in the Noah-Abraham-Exodus narratives. These divisions can be understood, in this paradigm, as a true “lost equality,” a necessary compromise between the ideal and the real, between human beings’ ontological equality and the realities of society. This vision would see the mitsvot in which these hierarchical distinctions are embedded as necessary compromises with specific socio-historical realities, as Rambam argued in the case of sacrifices and as we implicitly assume in the case of slavery. The goal, according to this vision, would be to work within the halakhic system to restore the real – society and halakhah - to the ideal to the greatest extent possible.On the other hand, even Henkin would not recommend that women "submit" to their husbands or to society, so maybe the parallel isn't exactly accurate. posted by Voice From The Hinterlands | 12:31 PM | Aidel Maidel finds that honesty is the best policy. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 10:58 AM |3 p.m. -- Councilmember Larry Seabrook rallies in support of Lyudmia Tesher, an orthodox Jewish woman who claims her franchise agreements with Sunoco were terminated for discriminatory reasons; Barstow Avenue and Coop City Boulevard, Bronx.You might recall that Seabrook ran in an extremely racialized primary against Eliot Engel a few years ago. posted by Steven I. Weiss | 10:23 AM | Noon -- Mass marking 64th anniversary of Hitler's invasion of Poland; St. Stanislaus Bishop & Martyr Church, 101 E. 7th St.posted by Steven I. Weiss | 10:20 AM | |
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